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Various Laws Paradoxs Axioms etc. about Work

Cyberman

Moderator
Moderator
Kauffman's Paradox of the Corporation - The less important you are to
the corporation, the more your tardiness or absence is noticed.

The Salary Axiom -
The pay raise is just large enough to increase your taxes and just
small enough to have no effect on your take-home pay.

Weiner's Law of Libraries -
There are no answers, only cross-references.

Kenny's Law of Auto Repair -
The part requiring the most consistent repair or replacement will be
housed in the most inaccessible location.

Second Law of Business Meetings -
If there are two possible ways to spell a person's name, you will
pick the wrong one.
-Corollary - If there is only one way to spell a name, you will spell
it wrong anyway.

Lampner's Law of Employment -
When leaving work late, you will go unnoticed. When you leave work
early, you will meet the boss in the parking lot.

Quile's Consultation Law -
The job that pays the most will be offered when there is no time to
deliver the services.

Loftus's Law -
Some people manage by the book, even though they don't know who wrote
the book or even what book.

Van Gogh's Law -
Whatever plan one makes, there is a hidden difficulty somewhere.

Troutman's Fifth Programming Postulate -
If the input editor has been designed to reject all bad input, an
ingenious idiot will discover a method to get bad data past it.

Lerman's Law of Technology -
Any technical problem can be overcome given enough time and money. -
Corollary - You are never given enough time or money.

Lovka's Advice -
Never rely on a person who uses "party" as a verb.

Cyb
 

WhiteX

New member
Kenny's Law of Auto Repair -
The part requiring the most consistent repair or replacement will be
housed in the most inaccessible location.

That is the main reason i get under desks and get dirty, just after that, i have to meet someone important.
 

BlueFalcon7

New member
Reminds me of murphys laws...

But I do like the one
"Troutman's Fifth Programming Postulate -
If the input editor has been designed to reject all bad input, an
ingenious idiot will discover a method to get bad data past it."
 
OP
Cyberman

Cyberman

Moderator
Moderator
Lerman's Law of Technology -
Any technical problem can be overcome given enough time and money. -
Corollary - You are never given enough time or money.
That one is the story of my life. :D

Cyb
 

Toasty

Sony battery
Lerman's Law of Technology -
Any technical problem can be overcome given enough time and money. -
Corollary - You are never given enough time or money.
That one has to be my (least?) favorite too. :happy:
 

A.I.

Banned
Here's a few laws that has puzzled mankind for millinium.

3 Laws of Urnination:

1. When you desperately need to go the urinal is always full.
2. Just when you think you are alone in a public bathroom a man with larger penis than you will suddenly walk in and stand beside you.
3. The yellow things floating in the porcelain bowl are NOT lollies.
 

pegasus001

Normal User
Van Gogh's Law -
Whatever plan one makes, there is a hidden difficulty somewhere.

Troutman's Fifth Programming Postulate -
If the input editor has been designed to reject all bad input, an
ingenious idiot will discover a method to get bad data past it.
Cyb

These two are my most favorites ones. It seems that they match my humble programming experience.
 
OP
Cyberman

Cyberman

Moderator
Moderator
Loftus's Law -
Some people manage by the book, even though they don't know who wrote
the book or even what book.
This one is subtle, if you understand the logic essentially it says "Some people can't manage." However it does so in demonstrating how clueless they are they can't manage. :D

Cyb
 

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